Friday, May 14, 2010

Sex After Sixty

Tips and Thoughts for Sexual Fulfillment and Enjoyment

Getting older does not necessarily mean declines in appearance or sex appeal are inevitable. In fact, aging can provide a freedom to explore and experience sexual pleasures.

As we mature, many come to realize a freedom to explore and enjoy our sexuality. Just because you've reach the so-called “golden” age, does not mean you hide in dowdy clothing. Seniors, today, are self-assured, intelligent, computer savvy, and independent. They care for their skin, bodies, and enjoy provocative attire. So, just because you are not 30-something, don't hole up, and think that sex and intimacy are a thing of the past! In fact, getting older can offer steamy, intimate relationships.

Being sexy after sixty is not a fantasy, or an unobtainable dream. Yes, there may be facial lines and wrinkles, not so pumped muscles, and skin appearing to be a bit too large for your body. So what? Beauty and sexuality are not only enjoyed by others forty years your junior. You have beauty and self-expression, and you've earned the freedom to relax and enjoy sexual encounters. Perhaps, the reflection staring back at you in the mirror is not-so-perfect, but you're still vital and beautiful.

Okay, with that said, there are some do's and don'ts for looking and feeling your best.

Never, never tower over your lover and look down into his eyes! When we were young, smooth and tight facial skin, undeniably, enhanced our beauty. But, as we age, the skin sags and tends to hang loosely when we are in a stooping position. Don't believe me, bend over and look at your face into a mirror! No more discussion about this will be needed!

If possible, have your lover see you in a reclining position, as much as possible. This position helps camouflage deflating buns, droopy breasts, floppy arms, and that dreaded not-so-firm facial skin.

Candlelight or diffused lighting is a girl's best friend! Sex in the afternoon is delicious, but anatomy flaws, wrinkles, and excess pounds are exploited by harsh daylight! Strive for a darkened room, or be safe and enjoy sexual intimacy after the sun has set.

Lubricants usually become a necessity, but are not mandatory visuals. If you need additional moisture, apply it, discretely, before or during foreplay. However, sensually anointing genitals (yours or his), and inviting your partner to join in and enjoy some self-arousal techniques, can be an erotic experience.

Sex organs are not the only part of the human anatomy that is involved with the sexual act. Fantasies add new dimensions to intimate experiences. Vocalizing or acting out fantasies with your partner can stimulate sexual urges, by providing food for thought and interactive play. If you'd like to expound on specific fantasies, costumes are readily available. But, be sure to discuss fantasy play with your partner before surprising him/her. Be sure he/she wants to be involved in fantasy play. Remember, sexual fantasies should not cause anger, jealousy, or pain for your partner. Fantasy should be enjoyable and enhance sexual intimacy.

Never, never parade around in baggy, torn, or yellow briefs or boxers, as this can ruin a perfectly good sexual experience! Boxers and briefs can be sexy and inviting IF they fit properly. Shop for mid-thigh boxers that fit nicely over and around your penis. You don't want to look like you're about to burst the fabric, but the brief/boxers should not look like they'll fall off, or that there's room for another body in that backside! Check out sexy body suits, similar to weight lifter's apparel. There are racer back stringer tanks, and, of course, if you still have tight abs and butt, then by all means sport a thong!

Don't overlook the magic of silk for men. A silk kimono is touchable and is most inviting to the fingertips. The kimono can hide deflated chest muscles, bulging stomachs, unshapely thighs, and droopy derrières.

Take the emphasis off hair thinning or baldness with tasteful and sexy apparel.

If male enhancements are necessary, don't blurt out that you must take a hard-on pill. Be discreet! There's no need to voice performance problems in the middle of an intimate encounter.

If you like sex toys, be sure to discuss this with your partner prior to displaying dildos, vibrators, or strap-ons. Honesty, expectations, and personal desires are a two-way street!

Fantasy can benefit your sexual experience. In the ladies section, you can fine more reasons to explore fantasies and role-playing. But, never insist your partner engage in your fantasy or demand their involvement in costumes or roll-playing! Fantasies are not real, and should not cause any distress, inhibitions, or pain for your partner. In other words, a fantasy should be fun and exciting, imaginary journey.

Many females enjoy getting and performing oral sex. But, don't just expect your partner enjoys or even wants to get or do oral sexual acts. Talk about likes and dislikes before any expectations or disappointments arise.

If lubricants or stimulating creams/oils are used, invite your partner to apply them to your penis. Of course, this is not necessary, but interaction can enhance sexual experience and desire.

Spontaneity is a wonderful tool for seniors. But, planning can be advantageous to many that require time for medicines to signal effectiveness, i.e., Viagra. Sex toys can play a major role because, unlike the virility of the young, as men age, stamina can disappoint or dissipate as quickly as it started. Nowadays, sex toys, lotions, vibrators, and lubricants may be considered essential versus absurd.

Yes, sex after sixty is different, in some aspects. The female body might not be the taut, toned physic that (mostly likely) you've taken for granted. The male body might no longer be endowed with a masculine chest, a full head of hair, tight stomach, muscled arms and legs. Some men's pecs now look more like breasts! The female's breasts, most likely, have more sag and less perk. Men and women's buttocks no longer are round, tight, and firm; faces become cursed with jowls, voluptuous lips are gone, and skin refuses to fit tightly over the body's frame. But intimate touch and feelings remain alive and enjoyable.

Accepting who we are, what we have, and loving ourselves is the ultimate destination. When we debunk peer pressure and dismiss youth-oriented advertising, we can see the beauty within ourselves. Then we begin to live!

Seniors have and can share many intimate thoughts and desires. Unfortunately, many hide their feelings, and walk a lonely journey. Okay, so you've reached the age of sixty. You haven't been cursed, you've been blessed, and along the way, you obtained much knowledge within the adventure and journey of life. Now, relax and enjoy the rest of the ride.

Give respect and consideration to your partner. The enjoyment of sexual experiences will be as explosive as ever.